12 Ways To Improve Your Dating Life

These tips go beyond the basic ways to improve your dating life like updating your online dating profile or getting a makeover. When you’re dating in your 30s and 40s your time is precious, and whoever you spend time with will need to complement your lifestyle.

In this article, I’ll share several lessons that I’ve learned that have helped reshape the way that I look at dating and the internal work to improve myself so I can be ready for when the right person comes into my life. 

Focus On Being The Best Version Of You

One of the best lessons that I’ve learned about dating is focusing on myself. So much of my dating experiences in my 20s and 30s was focused on making my partner happy and bending over backwards to accommodate them, while that same energy wasn’t being given to me. Now I know that I can only control my behavior and work on improving myself. When you focus on being the best version of yourself, you will grow in confidence, and that energy can’t help but to attract a partner with the same or higher energy. 

If there is an area in your life where you feel that you can improve in or weakness, write them down and develop a plan to start working towards gaining the skills or knowledge that you need to be the woman that you’ve always dreamed that you could be. 

Date Yourself First

Continuing with the theme of focusing on being the best version of yourself, solo dating is a must when you’re single. When you date yourself, you come to know your likes, dislikes, and a chance to explore.

Getting Strong Mentally & Physically

Being in your best shape mentally and physically will not only make you feel confident and help you make better decisions in life. When you’re feeling good you know your worth and you won’t settle for less. Use this time to journal, see a therapist to work on past relationship trauma, and work on improving your physical health. 

Detach Yourself From The Outcome

Daydreaming about getting married to your date after date one or two is setting yourself up for disappointment. When you’re detached from the outcome of your dates, you won’t take each date so seriously and keep yourself open to other dating opportunities. 

Get In Touch With Your Emotions

Are you still holding on to emotions from the past, those same unresolved feelings will show up in your relationships. Journaling is a great way to work through your feelings and to process your past relationships and discover the lessons that you’ve learned and what you want for your future relationships.

Date With A Purpose

Get clear about what you want in a relationship and clearly communicate that vision for your future with the men you date. Within the first few conversations you  need to get real and say what type of relationship that you’re looking for: a long-term relationship leading to marriage, no-strings, or friendship.

When you’re clear about what you want, the men who don’t align with your desires will either step away or you will identify them quickly and send them packing. When you know what direction you would like your relationship to go and the relationship that you’re not willing to tolerate, it makes everything so much clearer.

Go On Second Dates, Even If The First Date Wasn’t Great

Let’s be real, I hate going on first dates. You’re sitting across from someone that you don’t know and wondering if this person is worth your time. Sometimes nerves can ruin a perfectly good date and sometimes the first date isn’t the best reflection of who you or the other are. If asked, give the person one more chance (unless you have the creepy suspicion that your date is wanted for murder in another state).

Relationship Mentors-Ideal Relationship

Do you know a couple that represents that type of relationship that you would like to have with your future spouse? Have you ever sat down and heard their love story and how they make their relationship work? Look around you in your life and use them as relationship mentors. They can share wisdom, struggles, and secrets to making their relationship thrive. 

Tell Your Friends That Your Single & Looking For A Good Spouse

If you’re single don’t be afraid to let people know that you’re looking for someone. Be specific about what you want your looking for in a marriage. Your soulmate might only be a few friends away, if only you would ask. 

What That Relationship Would Feel Like

While you’re rolling solo it’s a good idea to visualize what your ideal relationship will feel like. How would you like to be treated? What type of partner have you always dreamed of? Act as if you already have that person in your life. Feel those butterflies in your stomach and the warmth in your heart. 

Keep Initial Phone Calls & Text Messaging Brief

When you initially start dating it’s a good idea to keep phone calls and text messaging brief. The focus should be building a real connection in person. Virtual communication can lead to miscommunications. Getting to know the true essence of a person is the time spent together and having intimate conversations. 

Don’t Adjust Your Schedule To Accommodate Your Date (Unless your in a committed relationship)

Let’s be real, if you’ve only been on one or two dates why should you interrupt your normal routine. Instead, continue your busy lifestyle and only accept dates when it works for you. Once you get into a relationship then it will be appropriate to flex your schedule to compromise with your partner. 

You don’t need to implement tips all at once! These are stepping stones to building up your confidence, helping you to navigate the dating world to improve your dating life.

Now that you have these tips it’s time to put them into action!

If you enjoyed these 12 Ways To Improve Your Dating Life, check out Single Career Women Self-Care Tips and Dating In Your 40s | Tips To Be Your Best So You Can Attract Your Perfect Match.